Elektrine
Log in Register
Paige Chat Timeline Gallery Friends Email Drive DNS Private DNS Domains VPN Kairo Nerve
Remote

Hedgewizard 🐈

@Hedgewizard@beige.party
mastodon 4.6.6
  • Open on beige.party

Irish British/Kiwi in Aotearoa. Writer, Dungeon Master, stressbaker, reluctant pharmacist, cat magnet. He/him.

Distracted since 1966.

469 Followers
201 Following
50 Posts
Joined December 29, 2023
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago

When I was eight we learned about preying mantises at school in Ireland and I was like Whoa! So weird! Well I'm never going to see one of those!

I would love to go back in time and tell 8yo me that I would move to New Zealand where every autumn would be a battle to save dozens of the plucky little buggers from being turned into spiky green vomit sausages in the throat of my stupid cat

71
10
22
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@flexghost@mastodon.social I had mine set to DEET DEET DEET DEET
16
3
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@UkeleleEric@mstdn.social @fazalmajid@social.vivaldi.net @codinghorror@infosec.exchange Part of the point of UBI schemes is that it's cheaper to just set simple criteria and give everyone the money, than run any kind of means-testing bureaucracy. That raises strong philosophical objections from right-wing thinkers, but AFAIK every pilot scheme (and there have been MANY worldwide) has shown the same result
13
1
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 1mo ago
Replying to
@davidgerard@circumstances.run How every conversation with GPs has gone lately. "I would like to use an AI app to take the notes of our conversation today. Are you okay with that?" "On two conditions. First, can you send me a copy of the notes?" "Certainly. And the second?" "If I point out inaccuracies, can you send me a copy of the corrected file?" "...I am not sure how that would work. I'll have to talk to the practice manager." <...crickets from practice manager>
2
1
3
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago

Tomorrow's Southern Hemisphere plan:

1. Make a pile out of all the warm fluffy things in the house
2. Add cats to top of pile
3. Burrow into middle of pile with a packet of biscuits and a book

30
2
10
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
But the joke is on pizza guy - it's Domino's so I always chew slowly, because I'm wondering if I've accidentally taken a bite out of the box by mistake
13
0
3
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@Lanahttps://theshovel.com.au/2026/03/18/worlds-greatest-negotiator-a-bit-out-of-his-depth-now/
theshovel.com.au
16
0
5
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago

If you feel like your life is off kilter, like you just can't get back on the beat -do what the professionals do. Turn around and follow the drummer

15
0
10
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@noodlemaz@mstdn.games New Zealand. Not an easy move, not a cheap one, but so so rewarding. Language not a problem. Economy has been struggling but hopefully just about to take off. No shortage of ex-Brits here on Masto who can offer advice if you want to look into it.
3
2
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 1mo ago
Replying to
@LivingTheDream@mastodon.scot It's true, those banks look pretty god damned bonnie to me
1
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@Nickiquote@mstdn.social @TheBreadmonkey@beige.party I mean it's the sort of town that people know you come from because of your HAIRCUT. "Oh, is Mairéad working still?"
5
0
1
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@nest@infosec.exchange @dan@discuss.systemshttps://beige.party/@Hedgewizard/114562616684685201
beige.party

Hedgewizard 🐈: "DM (adjusting screen) "On each side of the ancie…" - beige.party

2
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago

Oh goddamn, RIP Nicholas Brendon. Not an easy life.

7
0
6
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago

I was BORN too old for this shit

7
0
3
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago

Finally figured out why New Zealand garlic is so disappointing, both in the shops and in the garden - it's because the only commercial variety here is printanor.

Printanor hates winter temperatures, needs to go in in the spring and never bulbs up properly. Straight in the bin, imho. So that's off my grow list until I can get a heritage variety from Koanga or similar. Bugger.

#gardeningNZ

beige.party
6
0
5
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@allanwol@mastodon.social @ErikUden@mastodon.de Sounds exactly like something a nazi would say. Blocked.
3
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@Sea1Am @Axolotl1 @Tamami I love baked potatoes and I cannot lie
5
0
1
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@Em0nM4stodon @the Bitter winter elder - enjoy it over ice!
6
5
3
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@d1@autistics.life @autistics@fedigroups.social Bookmarked it but now it's unavailable. Waah
2
1
2
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 2mo ago
Seems like a good time to remind people who Farage includes among his friends #nigelfarage #andrewtate
1
0
1
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@brad@toot.chez.gay @Furball@tiggi.es @matt@oslo.town I spoke to a food technologist once who had poured six months into trying to stabilise the pulp in a soft drink called Orangina so that they stayed in suspension for longer without the mouthfeel becoming slimy. Couldn't do it. The solution? Pass it to the marketing boys, who came up with 'Shake the bottle, wake the drink'
2
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@robchapman @benroyce @Wen Reminds me of a fascinating door in the RDS which bore the sign "This door is neither an entrance nor an exit", under which some wag had written "technically all functional doors are both"
4
3
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@the_wub @lykso @jonny I think they're calling it 'cognitive surrender'
4
0
1
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@bruthavoodoo @brianbilston What has claws and goes meow? Cat strapped to a formula 1
3
0
1
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@georgepenney@sunny.garden Folk gig at Fairfield House, beers with a mate who turned out not to be in Nepal, organizing a taster D&D game for an awesome 16yo Aspie, board games and BBQ... I hope yours is going swimmingly too!
3
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@georgepenney@sunny.garden Aw now I want fry bread. Great job George
3
2
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@EllenInEdmonton@yeg.bike @bob_zim@infosec.exchange @kimlockhartga@beige.party Some larger CSA schemes print out little recipe cards to put in the boxes, which worked really well in the one we joined
1
1
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@skinnylatte Aaaaaand that's enough internet for one day
2
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@d1@autistics.life @autistics@fedigroups.social Back up! Snagged a copy thank yoooou
1
0
2
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@carpetbomberz@mastodon.online @JeffGrigg@mastodon.social @musevg@23.social @denisbloodnok@mendeddrum.org @dryak@mstdn.science @cstross@wandering.shop @aral@mastodon.ar.al @s10n@mastodon.social @matt@oslo.town Used to feed the dog using one of those when I was a nipper. Still got the scars.
1
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@benroyce @robchapman @Wen
2
1
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@robchapman @benroyce @Wen Its 😅
2
1
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@xchi @stux He's attempting to say that the pens they gave him to use and gift to important visitors are expensive and don't work, so he had somebody arrange Sharpie markers with a plain black barrel and the White House logo on them. That's it, that's the whole story. Except what he actually means is he doesn't know how to load and use a quality fountain pen, so what he's showing is his poor formal education and his resistance to learning and listening. He fell in love with Sharpies because production managers in the TV business use them. The fountain pens are intended to last for decades. He uses a fresh Sharpie marker every time he needs a pen and the old one presumably gets forced up Captain Planet's butt crack by his EPA pick.
2
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@kimlockhartga
2
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@catflyhigh @the @Em0nM4stodon You could also make elderberry syrup - i made some with cloves in as a winter cough mixture!
2
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@AmeliasBrain@mstdn.ca @alice@lgbtqia.space I am simply going to respond to this observation with a moment of reflection and "oh no"
1
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@futuresprog@mastodon.nzoss.nz Similar milage, likewise 8 tyres but also one 8v battery when the old one carked it, and a full set of wiper blades just for a treat
1
2
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@airshipper@cloudisland.nz South - Nelson. Millions of em
1
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@Alice Perfect for fancy restaurants. Just hold it up and SLUP-slup-slup-slup-slup-slup-slup-slup
1
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@rdm @matthegap @weirdestate Comes with a cenobite bartender
1
1
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@theropologist 👍
1
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@thomasbeagle "Owaah the microphone on this is just perfect for warming my asshole"
1
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@itsfoss@mastodon.social Let's not forget that old tradition, "something's wrong Saturday"
0
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@x281x1@defcon.social @dbattistella@mstdn.ca Edgy take, very rational. You'll do well here, blocking you for zero visibility on posts, follows and followers.
0
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party Is it just me or are the jars in Ballyclare all lopsided now? They look like a row of Frenchmen in little berets
0
3
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@electropict@mastodon.scot @angusm@mastodon.social Came here up say that. 'Don't look into the ball, you don't know what may be looking back'
0
0
1
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@noodlemaz@mstdn.games It does help. Some people come over on a two year work visa, luck out and find a suitable employer and stay - but it largely depends on what you do. Definitely do your homework if you're thinking about it
0
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@seismic007 Well https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Space_Cadets_(TV_series)
en.wikipedia.org
0
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@emma_cogdev @RickiTarr Thanks! I reckon mine might be on a sofa covered with cats in an alcove just off a bakery
0
0
0
0
Open post
Hedgewizard 🐈 @Hedgewizard@beige.party
· 6mo ago
Replying to
@emma_cogdev @RickiTarr Do you have a reference for what you learned about that position? Nothing jumps off the hellscraper for me
0
2
0
0
Back
313k7r1n3
Elektrine

Tor hidden service

elekhj7afj4qnrr4yd3bkzslsyo5jgfxw3orgjkhlcxifueodybyiiad.onion

I2P eepsite

j6b6cyk6gjmepjih7jjadxgxvvf3lzzujljuu2v4biemzpg3naya.b32.i2p

Platform

  • Email
  • Chat
  • Timeline
  • VPN
  • DNS

Company

  • About
  • Contact
  • FAQ
  • Lite (no JS)

Legal

  • Terms of Service
  • Privacy Policy
  • Transparency Report
  • Report Abuse
  • Warrant Canary
  • VPN Policy

Support

  • support@elektrine.com
  • Report Security Issue
Mail client setup IMAP mail.elektrine.com:993 POP3 mail.elektrine.com:995 SMTP mail.elektrine.com:465
© 2026 Elektrine. All rights reserved. Server: 03:03:38 UTC