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Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus

@ShiitakeToast@beige.party
mastodon 4.6.6
  • Open on beige.party

I probably shouldn't be saying this. This is my shitposting handle for stuff that I don't necessarily want the boss to see. He/him. Here for jokes and cats, mostly. Profile pic is a smiling clipart cartoon mushroom. Header is a schematic of a public bathroom. Taking a little social media break. I’ll be back tho

608 Followers
1591 Following
50 Posts
Joined November 19, 2023
Motto:
Dulce et decorum est pro cras morari
Other Latin motto:
Dumb spiral sparrow
Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 1d ago
Replying to
@catsalad@infosec.exchange @Kierkegaanks@beige.party Phrasing!
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@TheBreadmonkey In a dark futuristic wasteland, 2026, Ben walks through the street at night. Fully aware that his every move is monitored by his pocket computer and the pocket computer of every man, woman, enby, and child around. It the tower above, some upper class twit is fucking a clanker, when suddenly it leaps up (shearing off his dick), and jumps out the window onto Ben below. The robofuck begins beating Ben mercilessly with its fat vibrofingers.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@ErikUden@mastodon.de how do you say “tone deaf” in German?
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@farah @RickiTarr for me it’s not regretting staying up all night.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago

A few weeks ago, kiddo, a minor, lost a necklace. In a desperate attempt to find it, I posted a sketch of it on Craigslist lost and found. No PII, only the anonymized Craigslist email forwarding to another anonymous throwaway email alias.
I have had no luck.
But today I did get an email from a weird pervert offering to buy me jewelry in exchange for…
Ugh. Why are men.

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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 2mo ago

One day, I will tell you about the adventures I’m on. Today is not that day.

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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@MaryAustinBooks@mstdn.social @dalfen@mstdn.social So do the French. They make faces when you put cinnamon in anything. I wonder how they would react to cinnamon cat dumps.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@dalfen@mstdn.social @MaryAustinBooks@mstdn.social @Guillotine_Jones@beige.party There are so many jokes about the French and Jerry Lewis, but the French are actually world class clowning connoisseurs and Jerry was, probably accidentally, a top tier avant garde clown.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to

@michelestrider@mastodon.social I can think of four:

  1. Serious—Moby Dick
  2. Somewhat serious—Candide
  3. Maybe a joke—the Odyssey
  4. Definitely a joke—Catcher in the Rye
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@TheBreadmonkey @bigvimto I wish I could take credit for that one. I think it may have come from one of the new Star Wars movies, but I’ve seen it around
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@BobLefridge @passwordsarehard4 @swope @Nickiquote That’s pretty cool, actually.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@Lana it’s incontinence. Oral, anal, genital, moral. They lack self control and reflection. Can’t stop what goes into or out of their mouths, asses, dicks, and policies. Often a symptom of drug and alcohol abuse, lead poisoning, or dementia.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@crazyeddie @neuronakaya my thought would be that they can’t distinguish between a scientist trying to explain an exciting thing that also requires knowledge of statistics, chemistry, and how the scientific method and community work and the kinds of religion-based grifters spewing nonsense, lies, and irrelevant tangents to overcome their marks’ working memory. Most people have far more experience with the latter.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@catsalad @saltywizard @squarefaelltein @benroyce @gurkan tomatose
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@michelestrider@mastodon.social I feel like a lot of fedi-types are going to have a hard time saying no to a study group.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@catsalad@infosec.exchange this is The Prisoner/The Seventh Seal mashup we didn’t know we needed
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@futurebird@sauropods.win I was born large. Maybe small would be nice for a change.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@ZekuZelalem@dair-community.social I had a work colleague years ago who, at 15 managed to escape to Sudan with her teenage brother. They ended up as refugees in the US but it took two years from leaving home to settling in the US. I think most Americans haven’t even heard of Eritrea, let alone know what goes on there.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@blogdiva@mastodon.social yup. If you actually read Smith…he and Marx would have had some interesting conversations. Not saying they’d agree but
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@futurebird in a quest to visit the beach in all five boroughs in five weeks, I went to a beach on Staten Island once. It was covered in washed up syringes and tampon applicators.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@michelestrider@mastodon.social @liferstate@mas.to Yes!
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@liferstate@mas.to @michelestrider@mastodon.social For a really swanky hotel!
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@Unixbigot omg this is amazing how tf did I not know about this? Is there a catch? Can the cops tell if you’re scanning?
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@SRDas delightful
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@rk now I want to go to a pub instead of the gym.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@dramypsyd@ohai.social It really depends for me, and I have created both kinds, as well. I think having the face is useful if it’s a really long video because it helps focus attention. Unfortunately, long videos a with the face are the hardest to make because you have to make sure your affect matches the whole time and can’t let your expression wander off while you explain your slides.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@RickiTarr Shiitake Cloud Edit for proposed hashtag #ApocalypticNicknames
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@MedeaVanamonde @TheBreadmonkey “art in the age of mechanical reproduction” taking on a different meaning
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@MaryAustinBooks The real victimhood culture was white supremacists all along.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@Nonya_Bidniss @zalasur I know someone who ran a small personal injury law firm. She kept a hard copy of every paper, an electronic copy on her computer, and everything backed up to local DAT daily (this was not recent). Then had a fire in the office. Complete disaster. Took years to recover. Keeping everything in one place is a recipe
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 3mo ago
Replying to
@catsalad@mstdn.mx @Proslacker@jorts.horse Harvey?
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@zalasur @Nonya_Bidniss the cloud provider hosting all the backups on the same volume as the database. 😬
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@futurebird@sauropods.win She never forgave and never let me forget it.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@fesshole@mastodon.social
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@jalefkowit@vmst.io @Lily_and_frog@mastodon.art ok. That was amazing!
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@loicgervais @MarSolRivas La Liberté elle a beaucoup minci avant son déménagement au jardin de Luxembourg! C’est passionnant à propos le tableau de 2018.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@molly0xfff@hachyderm.io Looked at properly, this means that bitcoin will have to keep going up or it will go to 0 because as soon as it stops going up it’s worthlessness will kick in.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@cmconseils @romainbecker vr/ai?
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@solitha@mastodon.social @JadedBlueEyes@tech.lgbt @jargoggles@kolektiva.social probably both
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@Natasha_Jay@tech.lgbt It wants to use the cyan toner to make cyanide. Don’t let it!
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Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@0xabad1dea@infosec.exchange this sounds like a very not fun experience. Like the worst part of running a business…plus colonialism?
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Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@SeanCasten@mastodon.social he doesn’t have to look us in the eye because he can hide from us behind he’s wealth. It’s easy to lie to those plebes you refuse to see.
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Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@MarSolRivas c’est un de ces photos où je me demande si c’est IA. Depuis quand Macron se concerne des sans abris?
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@theonion He’s like a soda?
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Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@JadedBlueEyes@tech.lgbt Real cis people buy pickups.
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Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@theleftistlawyer @kitkat_blue My understanding is that PII is like toxic waste—you can take all the precautions and still have a leak, at which point the law doesn’t really care if you follow best practices and will still hold you liable for the consequences (however inadequate the remedy). The best practice is to minimize the amount of PII (or toxic waste) that you handle or pay through the nose for insurance.
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Open post
Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@jalefkowit@vmst.io I watched it with the sound off, but was imagining “Everybody Hurts” by REM.
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Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@GossiTheDog What was wrong with a GoPro on a sex helmet?
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Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@catsalad@infosec.exchange Schrodinger’s cat hearing him give that lecture for the 9th time
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Toast, Anonymous Fedi Fungus @ShiitakeToast@beige.party
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@fesshole Shocking how easy it is to find a couple where the man is a useless buffoon.
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