Replying to
@molly0xfff@hachyderm.io
The product of two imaginary numbers is a Canadian girlfriend.
Remote
Ainsley Lowbeer
@AinsleyLowbeer@mastodon.social
mastodon 4.8.0-nightly.2026-10-06Detective Inspector, Metropolitan Police ♔
I block all bots.
0 Followers
0 Following
50 Posts
Joined August 17, 2024
The American dream is now:
* Can afford used Corolla
* Able to pay rent on time
* No credit card debt
Truly a golden age we are living in!
A job interview is just two people lying to each other to get what they want.
Scott Jennings, a conservative pundit seen on CNN, has one of the most punchable faces onTV.
Replying to
@JenJen@mastodon.art Gotta be a member to read your rant, so it's just as well.
Kudos to Spain for helping the passengers of the Hantavirus infested cruise ship, reducing the chance that Donald Trump would order the ship destroyed.
Replying to
@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party
I will bathe you, but you won't like it.
Replying to
@michelestrider@mastodon.social
The real choice is to make every clown in the car eat a bayonet, but I picked poker instead.
Replying to
@christopherkunz@chaos.social @fribbledom@mastodon.social
Don't Trumpet your ignorance on this platform.
Replying to
@annecavicchi@mindly.social
If they pursue and attack and get close enough for me to wring their neck, that's what will happen.
I told a joke so funny today that HR wants to hear it at 9am tomorrow morning.
Replying to
@The_Whore_of_Blahbylon@mastodon.social Or even cross his legs.
Replying to
Replying to
@shanselman@hachyderm.io
Finally, Microsoft makes something useful. Thank you.
FBI desperately trying to figure out why time travelers keep trying to kill.
Replying to
@RickiTarr@beige.party
Mis-sis-sippi
Replying to
@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party
Birds aren't real.
Replying to
@Susibryant@mastodon.social @annecavicchi@mindly.social
That's the main plan, sure. But if it catches me, I'm confident I can grab it by the neck, swing it around in a circle and dash it against the ground, killing it.
Replying to
@golgaloth@writing.exchange
Vladimir Putin has a similar sign in Russian.
Я не умер — я просто так выгляжу.
Want to get ahead? Think about what your boss's boss needs. Like a swift kick in the ass.
Replying to
@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party
Delighted.
Replying to
@JenMsft@mastodon.social Gonna win all the Academy Awards, especially Ryan Gosling.
Replying to
@JenMsft@mastodon.social I did not!
Replying to
@mycrowgirl@batkaren they found your child.
Replying to
@meganmariehart
These are the new governors of the Federal Reserve.
Replying to
@selzero
Why didn't you come to see me before?
I predict these new charges against James Comey will be thrown out within 30 seconds when presented to a court.
Replying to
@michelestrider@mastodon.social At this point I bail and start reading about a southern beauty shop.
All those people have to go find dinner now.
A local TV station asks, "How much would you pay to watch the final game of the World Cup?"
Answer: Nothing
Replying to
@ivan_herman@w3c.social
For a second I thought it said Neanderthals, which also tracks.
Replying to
@shanselman@hachyderm.io
Trick or treat!
Replying to
@mycrowgirl@flipping.rocks
You let Stephen Miller go!
Replying to
@eniko@mastodon.gamedev.place
It's a ghost town.
Replying to
@nixCraft@mastodon.social The Pope is not the final arbiter of who or what has a soul.
Replying to
@catsalad@infosec.exchange
(i^2)^2 = 1
"Here's why the shooting at the White House correspondents dinner is bullish for NVDA."
Eagle Tactical explained by the New York Times. Hi, @GayDeceiver@mstdn.social
Replying to
@newsthump@mastodon.online
None shall pass!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xh83y_dk-ps
None Shall Pass
Replying to
I am facing the potential of losing my job for an aversion to engaging with power looms and Jacquard machines.
I am looking for work. I am in southern England.
I have some experience with
- Pedal looms
- Harnesses and heddles
My written-specific skills are unfortunately
- Quill pens
- Creative spelling
- Reading bills of materials
I do not want to engage with Jacquard machines in any way. If you know someone hiring something like this, I'd love to hear about it.
Replying to
@alicegg@hachyderm.io
This obscure post is annoying.
Replying to
@ilumium
Gosh, I thought all the important conferences were held in Zambia.
Replying to
@macf00bar@hachyderm.io
Does it matter? I think not.
I wonder if Trump will snort the nuclear dust in an attempt to gain superpowers? I hope so.
Replying to
@GayDeceiver
Yeah, we call that a foxhole. Start digging.
Replying to
@cmconseils@mastodon.social
Stephen Miller in the White House Ballroom.
Replying to
@th@social.v.st @jwz@mastodon.social
Memories, from the corners of my mind.