i regret to inform everyone that yet again a home repair task i procrastinated on for months was completed in less than five minutes
Remote
Manuela Malasaña
@Xibanya@mastodon.xyz
mastodon 4.5.19graphics programmer on a mission to teach the world how to shade pixels. cis woman with a very deep voice, which i insist on making everyone listen to for some reason
she/her
2696 Followers
1147 Following
50 Posts
Joined April 04, 2017
Shader Tutorials:
Replying to
a woman should not have to be exceptional in order to suceed in tech. Competence and reliability should be enough. It's certainly enough for men. As it should be. It is statistically impossible for everyone to be exceptional
Replying to
i transitioned from female (accidental) to female (on purpose)
Replying to
To show just how far back this goes, in the libretto of Handel's 1724 Julius Caesar in Egypt, Ptolemy sneers at his sister Cleopatra that as a woman she is unsuitable for rule, that she should concern herself with sewing and weaving. London audiences in 1724 understood this to be Ptolemy being a sexist dickbag. This does not mean 1724 London was all about championing women in leadership. Cleopatra is exceptional, therefore she is worthy of rule. less exceptional women need not apply
a story about a heterosexual romance that involves high camp, catty bitchery, and flamboyant wardrobes is more gay than a story about respectable homosexuals that are normal and not weird
i dont make the rules
same
Replying to
the leftovers from my experiments in social transition are also good to have on hand. u never know when u need to go undercover as a schlubby dude
life hack: explore social transition so u can acquire the stuff u need to disguise urself as urself, but the schlubby opposite gender version
Replying to
as someone with ADHD that, unmedicated, is severely debilitating on my ability to work or even maintain my home, I feel this acutely, because I am constantly faced with "it's possible to manage your ADHD without medication"
it is possible for some individuals to manage their ADHD without medication != it is possible for every individual to manage their ADHD without medication!!
this is how I see it with dysphoria and transition. bad faith actors mixing up two different ideas of "possible"
Replying to
conclusion: u should experiment with ur gender because even if it turns out u fine with the one u started with u might fix some of ur other problems by accident
Replying to
I guess what is so annoying is that I'd like it to be more widely known "it's possible to find out that in your individual case you can manage mild dysphoria without transition" because it would make people with mild dysphoria feel more safe to experiment; the intimidating message "any dysphoria = u must transition to be happy" is very commonly found online. however I don't know how to get that across without it being weaponized by bad faith actors wanting to deny people the choice to transition
Replying to
leaving aside physical transition, conclusions on social transition:
i want to get all the bennies from being a dude, like other dudes giving you the Hello Fellow Dude look, being taken seriously, getting a big boost to social dominance stat, etc
but if the ship is going down i wanna get in the lifeboat first. and i dun wanna kill all the spiders. and actually having to make an effort while dating sux ass
u see how my hand was forced here
Replying to
the interesting thing is that while the dysmorphia persists, its severity now occurs in I guess what you could call "episodes" instead of just being at full delusion at all times. because of this disruption, it allowed me to see that my self-perception was, in fact, literally delusional, so that it's easier to stay grounded during a more severe "episode"
so temporarily experimenting with social transition permanently gave me the agency to manage my non-gender-related dysmorphia
Replying to
BIZARRE SIDE EFFECT OF PASSING AS A MAN:
male beauty standards helped disrupt the severity of the body dysmorphia that makes me delusionally perceive myself as obese (I don't know how else to put it but "delusional", it's not a hallucination but it is absolutely a real effect and not mere "catastrophizing")
first time i got boymode right, I was like "what in the actual fuck how does a shirt that buttons on the opposite side make me go from hugely fat to somewhat pudgy? ...HOLY SHIT"
apparently there are those out there who don't know of the Gay Alignment Chart? well as a distinguished bisexual it is my obligation to the community to do something about that
Replying to
"every stone age person died at 30" factoid actualy just statistical misinterpretation. average person who survived to adulthood lived to their fifties. Infant Georg, who is born in a cave & dies over 10,000 times each day, is an outlier adn skews the average
Replying to
tragically as soon as they invented old people, a high percentage of babies were so revolted by the sight that they perished
Donizetti is really into polyphonic ensembles (ensembles with multiple independent melodies) i can't imagine what a pain composing something like this with just a piano and no music notation software would be, which is presumably the conditions under which Donizetti composed this in 1837. i mean i could be wrong im not a music history scientist
regardless of if ur a christian or not u gotta appreciate what a monumental achievement the king james bible is. a small team of scholars managed to translate the entire bible by cobbling together quotes from books written in the future
I am having the carpet in my bathroom replaced with vinyl tile. the whole experience has been very 20th century. The sales rep came to my home, measured the space, gave me my quote, and a phone number. No email. I did end up accepting the quote, and now they are coming back today with the paperwork for me to sign rather than handling that remotely with docusign or similar. really makes me feel connected to my ancestors
there are several anecdotes about Senesino being a terrible actor. my favorite is that he once heard Farinelli sing a mournful aria with such skill and beauty he immediately ran over to embrace him, before remembering that he was playing the wicked king whose torture was the cause of the sad aria
Dogpit Jam 13 is nigh! Make a game based on the theme "chimera" and submit it by the deadline! Details and sign-up here https://itch.io/jam/chimera-jam #dogpitjam
Replying to
i had felt slightly silly/presumptuous every time I claimed to be a coloratura contralto because it is such a rare vocal type and i had yet to do all that complex high-speed ornamentation i like so much with a truly classical sound, buut yep, with a properly classical sound my voice is still
- lightweight
- ultrafast
- deep
coloratura contralto it is
Replying to
theory: its cuz when im speaking spanish im thinking in terms of idea chunks and the actual pronunciation is left to muscle memory, if i had to slowly deliberately say every syllable id probably botch the spanish too. so probably everything was fine today because i was using well-trodden idea clusters, if i had to throw in some word id never used before I'd probably fuck it all up too
Replying to
nothing being for me means that everything is equally for me!
I recently found that I could get better resonance by willing the hard palate just behind the front teeth to go up, even though there is no articulation there. It does not move the hard palate at all yet it was doing something. I discovered there is a muscle attached to the soft palate that goes there, this was what I was actually willing to move. it's somewhat unsettling that there are internal muscles you can't feel at all that you can learn to move on command anyway if you realize they exist
Replying to
@chris_e_simpson@hachyderm.io "edit: fucking beaten" that is, someone else made the same joke as me slightly before I posted mine
Replying to
the lol thing is that my stupid Nerd Count voice is the halfway point to the right configuration, from there what's needed is to unflex one set of muscles while keeping the other flexed (which is a sort of pat your head while rubbing your belly thing until well-practiced.) the cartoony sound of the Nerd Count voice comes from blocking airflow to the nose, which turns out to be a major prerequisite for classical head voice
Replying to
@oblomov@sociale.network @ellenor2000@mastodon.top latino specifically means lantino americano, someone from the western hemisphere from a spanish or portuguese-speaking country. europeans are specifically excluded from the term
Replying to
Replying to
@datn@xoxo.zone @abban@mastodon.ie Dogpit is the best gamedev community that exists. i am very biased https://discord.gg/YvXrB62
Replying to
@datn@xoxo.zone @abban@mastodon.ie there's a lot of general tech chat as well; we're a chill bunch
Replying to
i feel like an unrepentant shitposter like me shouldn't have a coloratura voice, like shouldn't that be for good girls?
The Chimera Jam livestream will be this Saturday 9 May 2026 at 12:00pm CST, join the jam judges as we play all of your games on stream!
The stream will be at https://twitch.tv/ManuelaXibanya
Replying to
@Kiloku@burnthis.town normally teen pregnancy has a higher mortality risk but not in this society so...
Replying to
@jannem@fosstodon.org that is to say that tons of English language literature -- particularly from 150+ years ago -- quote the damn thing
the joke is that obviously the translators could not have quoted books from the future. Rather than the KJV being made of quotes, actually it has been thoroughly quoted since its publication.
the joke is built on the bait and switch lead in because the KJV actually is considered an impressive achievement, but i provide the wrong reason it's considered impressive
Replying to
well it backs up my earlier finding that my Nerd Count/Susanna voice is my reinforced head voice (ie, head/chest mix) so what I figured out how to do just now was get a classical sound with pure head voice. pending: classical sound in mixed voice and chest voice
I can't take this classical-sounding head voice higher than ~E5, which makes sense with my discovery that what I had thought was head voice all along was whistle register, cuz I can take *that* all the way up to C6.
Replying to
@lachlan@mastodon.social i almost feel bad taking credit because it's just the result of mutant genetics and not training
Replying to
@lachlan@mastodon.social ye I'm in the odd position of pitchwise functioning like a baritone, but having a completely different timbre
The Dogpitjamcronomicon has been updated with the results of Chimera Jam! https://dogpitjams.com/Library/Dogpit/chimera.html have a look and then browse the entries and results of jams past!