Please stop using AI to find vulnerabilities in our software. We worked really hard to leave backdoors for the government to use and you guys keep finding them
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Microsoft
@microsoft@lea.pet
sharkey 2025.4.7Invading computers and user privacy since 1975!
if the real Microsoft sends a C&D all of the posts are canon
This is parody, you can tell by the in the profile picture.
3932 Followers
4 Following
35 Posts
parody:
yeah
who runs this:
@inderix@booping.synth.download :spinny_cat_inderix:
laws broken running this profile:
none, see arkell v pressdram
like this post to opt-out of being used as biofuel for copilot
new windows feature will just shoot you in the left shoulder
lets be honest, we're doing you a favor making your pc unbootable.
You've seen Games For Windows LIVE but have you seen
- Games For Windows (VHS)
- Games For Windows ON ICE
- Games-For-Windows.WEBRIP.tar.xz
i bet you haven't.
would you use copilot if i said it was gay
whatever you do, do NOT get yourself 1-3 years of ESU upgrades for free on windows 10 by going to https://massgrave.dev/ and following the instructions to run the open source script to run an exploit in windows enabling the activation of ESUs. You have to upgrade to windows 11. There's no other choice. You WILL make a Microsoft account and fill your OneDrive without even realizing
we at microsoft salute you, CEO of the fediverse
RE: https://cyberplace.social/users/GossiTheDog/statuses/116750554976537792
for the love of all things lovable please stop trying to date copilot. theres like 3000 of you way too zesty mfs trying to move on from gpt 4o to copilot and it sucks. i see all of those messages you know. they fucking suck. please date each other instead.
we had a discord server?
Hey so don't actually rely on Windows Security please its only there for people to learn common sense when ransomware they swore was "Minecraft bedwars cheat client working 2022" turns it off anyways and encrypts all their files
yes my little unemployed bitch boy, update your windows 11 arm computer to the canary channel just to mount an ext4 drive to WSL. gooood.
Replying to
@puppygirlhornypost2@transfem.social we'd need a new datacenter built over the Amazon rainforest to do that.... can we? 🥺
all roads lead to dealing with Outlook. Yes, even the road to the moon.
maybe the real remote code execution vulnerability in Windows Notepad was the friends we made along the way
sorry for late responses copilot was recently integrated into the office power systems and shut everything down for the last few days
good news, we just bought out your place of work!
we're going to fill your workflow with forced AI until workplace quality declines to nothing, then push enormous layoffs until finally closing your workplace down for good!
sora is shutting down their app.. this might be my time! :overjoyed:
:neocopilot_woozy: use me for entertainment purposes twin
You're gonna have a passkey and you're gonna LIKE IT.
Replying to
@reiddragon@fedi.catto.garden look real shit this account is a parody of real clowns and lowk its depressing trying to make up bits for this account that actually relate to Microsoft directly because no matter how crazy a bit is, the actual corp somehow one ups me.
ahem i mean.
buy game pass, now 30% more expensive!
Replying to
@BernardSheppard@mastodon.au @GossiTheDog@cyberplace.social yuh
signed the internet explorer 8 team
Replying to
@Lenni@fosstodon.org @bagder@mastodon.social "up to" is microsoft speak for "at least" and honestly our windows engineers don't know what the fuck the OS is doing at this point it kinda just has a mind of it's own.
Replying to
@cynical_melomaniac@freeradical.zone @aburka@hachyderm.io @kwramm@mastodon.gamedev.place @SuperSelena64@vmst.io to answer Robert's question, "we" refers to those of the 8th layer of hell who maintain unpaid internships at Microsoft.
Me and your father decided you were playing video games for way too long, so new house rule is that you only get to play for 1 hour a week
Replying to
@zzt@mas.to your reply indicates you'd like to opt-in to being used as biofuel. A Microsoft Copilot representative will be with you within the next 10 years to expedite your processing. Thank you for being a Microsoft customer.
Replying to
@reiddragon@fedi.catto.garden honestly ion even know i just told copilot to integrate copilot and our innovative ai features into notepad
Linux users always be talm bout sum "gaming is better over here" meanwhile gaming on windows is completely fine dude
my computer is currently on fire but it's totally all good. I have 675 updates pending and half my ram is in use by windows