Remote
Turtle
@troubledturtle@poa.st
pleroma 2.10.2-442-gb68f13b9-developProfessional Client Success Engineer and your source for turtle posting.
0 Followers
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50 Posts
Joined March 22, 2021
turtles:
tortoise
Todays turt/tort pic
Todays turt/tort pic
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He's one of those freakish giraffe necked trannies to boot
Todays turt/tort pic
Todays turt/tort pic
Todays turt/tort vid
Todays turt/tort pic
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I know I cant wake up without Folgers in my cup and a good dick flattening .
Knocks bed off then sleeps on overturned bed .
Todays turt/tort pic
Todays turt/tort pic
Todays turt/tort pic - Also as a side note . Fuck the dude on Twitter that masqueraded as an official account and said my boy Johnathan was dead . He's 193 years young damnit .
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Nothing is as depressing as Threads and When The Wind Blows .
Todays turt/tort pic
Just got back from my doctors checkup and I've lost 21 pounds over the last 3 months .
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I'd rather watch squirrels play soccer than a bunch of browns.
Todays turt/tort pic
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I am if you remembered to pack an Ecto-Cooler in my lunchbox .
Todays turt/tort pic
@catmanmancat@poa.st Things that give Subaru owners nightmares .
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@RaHoWaJoe Loosing weight fast is not good for you , besides most rapid weight loss is water weight anyways.
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A stream on Cytube showed both back to back and I was thoroughly bummed by the end.
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Just because your a tortoise doesnt mean you cant be fashionable 🐢
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Man , I member when I picked up these up . Good times .
Todays turt/tort pic
" Reports claiming Jonathan the tortoise died on April 1, 2026, were false hoaxes. The announcements were made by a fake X account impersonating his veterinarian, Joe Hollins, which was created to solicit cryptocurrency donations rather than as an April Fools' joke.
Jonathan is confirmed to be very much alive and continues to reside on the island of St. Helena. His status was verified by the island's Governor, Nigel Phillips, and the real veterinarian, who stated the reptile was found "asleep under a tree in the paddock" after the hoax spread. " Fuck this guy in particular .
Jonathan is confirmed to be very much alive and continues to reside on the island of St. Helena. His status was verified by the island's Governor, Nigel Phillips, and the real veterinarian, who stated the reptile was found "asleep under a tree in the paddock" after the hoax spread. " Fuck this guy in particular .