✨pencilears✨(KD7POW)

This is what I mean when I say that I'm trying to sleep the sleep that sleeps:

The biggest problem with bisexuality is mono-attracted people have some of their gender identity wrapped up in a feedback loop of "you are attracted to my gender and you are attracted to me, therefore my gender is affirmed" which a bisexual cannot provide. This is, I think, why a statistically significant number of bisexuals end up in abusive relationships, or find themselves being mistreated.

The trouble I am running into in my life, is all my cozy cheap dorky nerd girl shit is becoming TRENDY and I hate it.

I have had very well meaning friends try to get me to adopt "pansexual", or any of a number of Tumblr micro-labels. But, I think self-identity works best when it's legible, and everyone knows what a bisexual is. My grandma might be scandalized, but she lived through the 90's, she knows what I'm talking about.

Anyways, I think partnered bi people ought to celebrate bi visibility day by wearing matching outfits. Wearing a matching outfit with your partner is bi culture.

Seeing people who never post on here get active because it's almost defcon and I want to make like one of those "don't buy a bunny for Easter" PSA's but it's like: "the fediverse isn't just for hackers!" With a montage of the kind of regulars you get on here. We also have: hams, movie buffs, trekies, bicyclists, artists, furries, teachers, gardeners, pets, and the chronically ill! Make a friend today!

I certainly experienced weird problems in my dating life before I met my wife, most of which seemed to stem from being incapable of affirming their gender through my gaze. Turns out this is not true if you're looking at a another bisexual.

a tumblr post for you

Doomerisim offers a kind of absolution. This idea that you have no responsibility to the world around you, to the future, to anything, I'm sure it must be freeing. I have none of that kind of freedom on offer.

@Em0nM4stodon@infosec.exchange ai note takers make mistakes, and, more importantly, taking notes means you are deciding what did and didn't happen. Because if it happened, but there's no record, then it didn't happen. Being the person who took the notes means you're the one who says what got decided. If you're not taking your own notes from every meeting you're in, you're surrendering to whoever did, and I trust Marsha from accounting a thousand times more than I trust any ai.

I know everyone finds it annoying, to be chipper and upbeat about the things you can do (all of them unglamorous and the work of decades) but I am willing to annoy you.

I have been thinking about how many times I have an interaction with the public at the aquarium that's like: they're trying to get me to admit that everything is hopeless or out of our hands as human beings and the only thing anyone can do is watch the world die and be sad about it, but also make no personal choices to change anything because all capitalism is equally bad and equally inescapable. And I won't do it.

What I want to do is what educators and interpreters did for me as a kid, which is reach out their hand and tell me that I have a place in the world. That there's things worth doing, fights worth fighting, and all of it is bigger than me, and needs what I can give, but in a long-term marathon kind of way. I needed that when I was a kid. I think everyone needs it even as adults, but this feeling of being linked in the great chain of being, the bucket brigade of centuries, is important.

"you can't say volunteering is a good way to meet people, I've been volunteering for years and everyone there holds me at arms length, they never invite me to hang out" I am making direct eye contact, I am looking deep into your soul, I am practically pressing my forehead against yours, and I am telling you, that this is a ~You~ problem.

@alice@lgbtqia.space Accurate depiction of how desperate you have to be to use those bathrooms. The stall doors are so low I can see out of them while sitting on the toilet.

we're repeating the thing about highly processed diets are correlated with negative health outcomes without accounting for class/income. turns out being poor is the variable that contributes towards both of those. but I don't think we're gonna talk about socialism and public health today.

@Em0nM4stodon@infosec.exchange also, I followed my therapist to private practice because she didn't want to use ai note taking for her clients.

this is the thing about crunchy mom fascism, it's got a thread of normal commonsense ideas running through it, but when you pull on that thread, you haul out bigger, deeper, ideas that are not so reasonable or common sense. plenty of people need a pep talk to boost their confidence when it comes to parenting. but authoritarian parents don't need to be told "you're the parent, they should do what you say, you don't need to be flexible or reevaluate your angle, just keep going harder"

Skill Issue.

also like, I know nobody wants to blame bad home cooking for picky eating because moms get enough shit. but how many people have been like "I thought I didn't like [Food Thing] until I had it at a restaurant?" almost everybody?? for me, that food is rice. turns out you need to rinse it and then cook it in a rice cooker. my dad, is just kinda bad at making rice.

@bebadefabo@mastodon.social that was deliberate, I also left out queers and trans people because your hacker friend is generally a trans queer leftist. Like, that whole set comes standard.

I think the best thing you can do for picky eating is to Get Gud at cooking. Skill Issue.

Today's discussion topic at the aquarium is "how do we exit the conversation?" If a kid or a tourist wants to wring every last fact out of my brain, I am not going to exit that conversation untill they've gotten everything they can from me. If a history channel brain-rot victim wants to mansplain megalodons? I will argue them down. Basically, I'm not trapped in this nerdy-ass conversation with you, you're trapped with me.

fascist dog-whistle number 4: "people don't eat as much with their families" and then mentioning health. what kind of family are people supposed to be eating with? do tell.

anyways, our author's closing statement is reminding me of this bit in The Egg and I where Betty McDonald has to deal with parenting advice that simply does not suit her children and has to learn to be like "ok, good for you" about how other people's children Always take naps and Always eat their carrots. because she has those kids over, and they won't nap and won't eat carrots, and their parents are just full of lies.

@ai6yr@m.ai6yr.org you know, if you were going to run a side business selling illegal things for cash, having the front be an estate sale company makes a lot of sense.

If I believed in doomerisim I wouldn't be here.

anyways, in conclusion, this book is kinda fashy. I think it fits a narrative that people want to hear, and the author thinks she is presenting a very authoritarian mindset as "counterculture" (dogwhistle number 6) if you are an adult who struggles with Food Problems consider picking up https://www.amazon.com/Picky-Eaters-Recovery-Book-Restrictive/dp/1108796176/147-6765513-1185456

I need all thin women with food opinions to Get Woke or shut the hell up.

we've asked our author to talk about appropriate snacks and she's mentioned "a handful of almonds" without irony or self-awareness.

Don't want to make my prickly introvert friends feel alienated by this take, I don't think you have to be universally appealing and easy to get along with at the expense of your peace and your morals. But like, even prickly introverts are doing better at maintaining good friendships in Seattle than the hateful wet blankets who need to move back to Ohio if they like it so much.

@guyjantic@infosec.exchange good, they recruit heavily within techie circles, (basically anyone who can be flattered about their intelligence) so it's important to be on guard.

@guyjantic@infosec.exchange the IPO is undervalued relative to their debts, and the instant they go public the house of cards starts falling. On top of this, too much of the money coming in is from Effective Altruists, (AI Doomsday Cultists) and they will absolutely throw more money at the problem when it's phrased like this.

@PetterOfCats@mastodon.world @alice@lgbtqia.space I do love how the gesture of a dad holding a baby with a full diaper feels pulled from life, it gives a nice sense of urgency and movement to the mural.

Walked outside and the air stung my eyeballs, so I think this haze might not be rainclouds. #Seattle

@menelie@mastodon.eternalaugust.com I've been answering questions on the Ask Seattle subreddit and so many people don't want to hear "it sounds like you're homesick, have you considered going home?" They will double down on how much they think the real problem is Seattle and everyone in it.

So, Okinawa is about the horrors of war and colonialism, but like, you see this perspective in the stories that each person in the story who's trying to help and make a difference does it by virtue of their social and familial bonds. The teacher speaks up because he cares about his students, the author's mother protects her children but also reaches out to everyone she encounters regardless of their initial hostility. The young woman is folded into her grandmother's role as a community leader.

Presuming everyone involved is bisexual (yourself included) which would you rather date?

@Kroc@oldbytes.space Local Seattle author Fred Moody actually wrote a book about the encarta team, it's called I Sing the Body Electronic https://archive.org/details/isingbodyelectro00mood

@Sharksonaplane@mastodon.sandwich.net I was taught, while working in food service, that part of my job was to be extremely explicit and clear about what's in the food because it's important to not surprise people with something that might hurt them. That runs counter to a lot of the parenting advice. Which is: to lie about what's in the food so you can sneak more vegetables (or more protein) into the meal. And like, this behavior just erodes trust.

@atax1a@infosec.exchange not all British people post like this, but it's also always a British person.

@cultdev@mastodon.social @Kroc@oldbytes.space he wrote later in his book Seattle and the demons of ambition https://www.amazon.com/Seattle-Demons-Ambition-Number-Future/dp/0312334001 that he had gone insane while embedded with the Encarta team

@TeflonTrout@beige.party if you want more, I got a whole webcomic https://pencilears.eternalaugust.net/comic/

@atax1a@infosec.exchange I'm gesturing at the normal problems with trying to hold on to the cultural values of whiteness while being any kind of a minority who doesn't Actually benefit from any of that. But like, you know, the gringas are at it again.

@atax1a@infosec.exchange Astrid would have an easier time in life if she could find it within herself to explain what she wants from her friends using specific concrete examples, and then make it a habit to speak up at the time of the incident when things bother her, and not stew in resentment for months while making everyone walk on eggshells around her wondering what the problem could be. So, I don't think that one is on you.

@atax1a@infosec.exchange this kind of brit-poster is always offended about specific word choice in a way that's not gonna lead to a productive discussion. Like, they're just reading with maximum antagonism and then trying to tone police because they have nothing substantive to add to the discussion.