Mhera!

Cars need three horns
1) Hey, just letting you know I'm here!
2) That was my bad and I am SO SORRY D:
3) -AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON!

Soft rolls should be served more. And everywhere. Themes be damned.

Taco Bell? Here's your rolls
Fajita truck? Here's your rolls
Waffle House? Rolls incoming

*sippy rooibos with milk*

*Happy ott sounds*

"So, how are you handling the cold up here?"

I don't own anything with long sleeves, I've gone through the last three winters with nothing heavier than a hoodie, and the only reason I brought a proper coat is because there was enough of a cold snap where, if the car broke down on the way to work, death was a possibility.

Orgasm
Andgasm
Norgasm
Xorgasm

"Store theft is on the rise! We're losing kajillions!"

Have you hired more employees, as it's been shown that employee presence will deter theft?

"No! But we spent significantly more on these locked cases!"

....

"Sales went down. So now we gotta fire people. Because theft."

.....................

"Theft went up in other departments! More locked cases!"

Three of my best sales working at Staples were ones that other employees didn't want to take. All three my manager told me to 'go see if I can figure out what they actually want'.

Little old Russian babushka that didn't speak a lick of English. Me and google translate got a workout getting her a fuckton of things for her granddaughter, who had gotten into college.

A kid (estimated age 8-10) buying a laptop. We were the fifth or sixth store that they went into where an employee walked away when they were told the kid was deciding and buying. Apparently I was the first one to even acknowledge the kid when told he was buying.

Blind guy and his mother. Zero vision. I was apparently the first person to address him instead of addressing his mom with questions. We didn't have what he needed...laptop with full keyboard and the menu key in the standard location...but I found something at best buy that -did- do that. They came back to get all the software and accessories from us.

...conversely, I once had a mute tell me to fuck off...elaborate set of hand motions if I'm being honest...for trying to sell him -exactly- what he was asking for...but was 5 dollars cheaper in store for some reason.

Y'know, I could deal with the fast food price increases if they didn't -also- often come with inconveniences elsewhere.

Case in point: CiCi's Pizza. Specifically Forest Hill.

Price Raised: Fair enough, I'm old enough to remember the jingle being 'all you can eat for only 2.99', inflation happens, yadda yadda.

No more parmesan shakers at the table, now only packets: Don't know what the waste could look like, but I've also seen people destroy and steal them, so whatevs.

To-Go cups only: Getting more than a bit sketchy now. I see the classic reds back there.

Now, the final one: Self bussing.

I can put up with all of these individually. But if you think for one goddamn minute I'm going to bus my own table when eating there was nearly double what it was to eat at the CiCi's in Cleburne, you're out of your fucking mind.

...which is -exactly- what I told the manager who was shouting at us to 'clean up our mess', in a deserted restaurant at lunchtime.

If you go into a store, grab a drink from the cooler on your way in, drink it, but end up shopping long enough that you have to hit the restroom...is that theft?

"uwu drinking it before paying for it is-"

Some stores used to have drink holders on the carts for this -very- purpose hush.

Hmmm...I want a good snap camera.

But it needs to have physical image stabilization...is that something even advertised anymore?

She's draining the audience...

of their aether.

Furry has a medical emergency. This is silly, so we're going to say Not Enough Hugs. Friends take them to the ER.

"Okay, so, you have a surprisingly large amount of knowledge of their allergies, medications, and whatnot. What's their name?"
"Wurflepaws."
"Haha. Cute. No seriously, what's their actual name?"
Confused furry sounds.

I wonder if I can still jump off of a swing at the park.

I have decided to ban myself from swingsets.

Escape Room: Bed

It's nice and cold outside the bed, with the perfect temperature between the sheets. There are no obstacles between you and the exit other than a cold hardwood floor.

You have one hour.

📹

"Maybe it is the smile. Is that a smile? I can't say."

"His eyes are black as obsidian, and his smile. No. It is not a smile."

Two of my favorite lines from Night Vale.

Hm.

Does anyone have any kitchen appliances/devices they just can't go without?

Not being considered: Air Fryer, Toaster, Rice Cooker, Microwave, or Instant Pot. These are part of, or already excluded from, my musings already.

#TADC should've been juuuust long enough for an extended intermission to be included.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how does your character handle being shot?

1 is Knives Millions
10 is Light Yagami

Yes, I know that's not a big difference.

@sierrashark@social.treehouse.systems Hmmm...ended up staying home today.

....*looks at presumably sleeping shark*

>:3c

*attaches air pump and goes about her day!*

DnD villain that chases the adventurers while aggressively doing the chicken dance.

MTG.

Opponent, also blue, spends quite a bit of time getting the top, like, 10 cards of their library in the -exact- order they want.

Casts card to draw 10.

"In response, I activate Drowner of Secret's ability 10 times."

...they scooped.

I can't help but feel that salmon would taste amazing battered and fried, catfish style.

Hmmmm....

...when not playing 'Baloo'...I was the mom a *lot* when playing House as a kid...

*adds this to 'list of signs'*

Dear body: Quit producing mucus or I'm dehydrating us >.o

http://globeoptical.qwestoffice.net/index.html

You just don't see wood paneling on websites like this anymore.

*gets out walker*

Back in my day, Wal-Marts used to have Radio Grill instead of other chain restaurants, with some of the best fucking burgers you could get from any chain.