1. Cleaned house
2. Wrote an apology email to someone I treated in an unfriendly manner
3. Had a cold plunge and soak in a friend's pool and hot tub
Remote
⚒︎(((🇻🇳Das Classist🇱🇦)))☭
@yosephus@mastodon.world
mastodon 4.7.3Mastodon account for jeff dorchen, writer of plays, essays, fiction, a movie, songs, and whatever pays that I can tolerate. Constantly broke. Broke right now. Born @ 318.43 ppm looking to get down to at least 20 ppm lower than my birth ppm.
avi is a world-weary cartoon flounder at a bar having a martini and a cigarette.
Header is a handpainted sign by a freeway entrance: "are you a experimental test subject"
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50 Posts
Joined November 13, 2022
1. Hot link grilled cheese and coffee for breakfast
2. It's Sunday
3. RIP Asha Bhosle, nice remembering you
1. Experienced an especially good episode of This Is Hell! this morning
2. Had an unusually good talk with my dad about assisted living
3. Got positive yet very helpful notes on my screenplay from an experienced screenwriter
1. Yesterday's coffee, of which I still have a half-carafe, is strong and tepid this morning, just how I like it.
2. No aches and pains!
3. New Based Fortune Cookie!
1. climbed around the hillside to find the ball the dog for some reason gave up on
2. and essay for Wednesday
3. posted a new Based Fortune Cookie for the week: Fortune 11
A commonsense anti-capitalist diatribe
https://notthisdorchagain.substack.com/p/fuck-you-broke
Replying to
@cy
Sadly, their box so often runneth over
Replying to
@cy @johnhattan @torf
I mean, the whole internet upon which we stand was directly part of DARPA. But, y'know, our principles are always open to question in a quasi-anonymous public space.
Very festive reception for the Artemisnauts. Balloons and everything.
This is the moment government illustrates perfectly why it doesn't deserve to exist.
Who asked for you? No one. No one asked for that free U2 album that popped up like a zit on everyone's app and no one asked for Manus. Manus the Anus. I already have one! A real one. It's called Egbert and it works just fine, thanks.
#3GoodThingsToday
Thawed a nice potato broccoli soup I'd saved for myself
Barley tea
Based Fortune Cookie, the first, best, and only electronic fortune cookie-based Substack account.
https://basedfortunecookie.substack.com/
Jeff, in conversation with the elusive Kernel, will present the apocalypse of the apocryphal artist Resh Shaprudhi, and how the elephant-headed lord of obstacles, Ganesha, entered the events of WWII in Europe.
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Had a good time making supper with friends last night
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Delivered a good commentary on the This Is Hell! radio show/podcast this morning
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Have a big jug of homemade barley tea in the fridge
Replying to
@vrek @torf @johnhattan
I'm sure there's a workaround if we need it in a pinch. If only I knew some folks with the skills.
There’s no fortune cookie like a Based Fortune Cookie
with a conceptual and/or material Lucky Talisman included!
He might as well wipe his ass on all our money. Talk about devaluing the dollar.
At least he didn't go with his plan of breading and deep-frying all US currency
Replying to
@aburka
She was one the Cardinal Pointer Sisters
A Treatise On Critical Voice Theory
https://notthisdorchagain.substack.com/p/simon-says-watch-your-mouth
Monkey Christ
Super Chimp
Are you a god or an evil imp?
Monkey Christ
Superstar
Driving around in a mini-car
Replying to
@pooh@mas.to
It was probably Bob Saget. Piglet, did he give you a milkshake to drink? According to Gilbert Gottfried, the Olsen twins had a similar experience.
The man with the Merde-Ass Touch strikes again.
What a stink-fingered dolt. POS can't do anything right.
Replying to
@vrek @torf @johnhattan
I bet they could make a ghost AK-47 (still the world's most reliable automatic weapon) in some really cool undetectable (classified) material - not sure clearance is too hard to come by in the Hegseth Pentagon. Might be able to trade it for a jug of Pappy Van Winkel
No disrespect intended, but I wouldn't be "American" if I didn't ask myself and everyone else at this time of year (tax time!), "Do you think, in hindsight, from a fiduciary perspective, Jesus played his cards right?"
image: Roman soldiers gambling for Jesus' cloak (jesusinbible.com)
- Got the toughest rewrite done.
- Had good herring and potato breakfast.
- Had a good day with the dog I'm taking care of.
- Writing partner is allowing me slack.
- Laundry done despite neighbors who left there's sitting in the washer cuz they think the laundry room belongs to them.
- Made Lao style papaya salad and sticky rice.
RE: @samuelpepys@mastodon.social
Oh, well, as long as the stocks were new and very handsome, nothing cruel and unusual. Sam, you're a true product of the gentry of your age.
Glass eyes made by Leopold Blaschka
Fortune 11, a new Based Fortune Cookie fortune and a new lucky token of the week
We know what we have to do. It's just a lot.
Replying to
Text and audio of this week's Right Twice a Day Substack article
https://notthisdorchagain.substack.com/p/disaster-revolution
New and improved version of this cleverness. Now with audio!
it's like old East Berlin up in this bitch.
https://notthisdorchagain.substack.com/p/a-friendly-warning-from-your-fbi
The future of prediction markets, predicted.
There's nothing wrong with Stephen Miller that some friendly advice and solitary confinement couldn't cure.
https://substack.com/@jeffdorchen/note/p-207739157
There should be no more Christians allowed to hold office until we find out WTF is going on.
Replying to
Everyone please enjoy a delicious Based Fortune Cookie on the house!
https://basedfortunecookie.substack.com/p/fortune-14
Replying to
@edgeofeurope
That's okay. She should still rest in peace!
Think it's a coincidence that the New Gilded Age of obnoxiously prevalent billionaires is also the New Golden Age of Fascism? Yeah, me neither.
Text and audio from this morning's Moment of Truth from today's This is Hell! show is right here:
https://open.substack.com/pub/notthisdorchagain/p/the-overweeners-overween-some-more?utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=web
RE: https://mastodon.world/@yosephus/116132594802165596
I just listened to this one, and I must say, I'm come across as very much on my game.
RE: https://mastodon.world/@yosephus/117044188882824978
Let's go! Enjoy my pride, it don't cost you nothing. Although under advice I'm not allowed to discourage you from paying me.
RE: https://mastodon.social/@samuelpepys/117275966422721708
But comely. Very fat but comely!
Quoting
Here I saw Mrs. Betty Pickering, who is a very well-bred and comely lady, but very fat.
Open quoted postTrump has the Merde-Ass Touch