Fatsgordo

Don't you fucking do it

My little cousin got hired to puppet around Mitch McConnel's body this weekend, so you all need to pretend he looks real

Target stole the idea for dynamic pricing from my racist uncle Leo who managed the Save-N-Shop

If I was in China, I'd open a fake Shaolin Temple as a fun way to torture foreigners

We need an app that lets you smell congress. Americans deserve that level of transperancy

(watching German scat porn) and these people think peanut butter is gross!?

On the one hand, its usually sad when someone dies. On the other, its always funny when a grown man is named Lindsey

These guys are making me dig my own grave. Like, I know it's good to plan ahead, but I don't think I'll need this for a while?

I should get every Friday off because what if its Ramadan or something?

Belgium's pretty good at Latin American Football

Despite being in so many Star Treks, to this day, William Shatner believes Babylon 5 really happened

If you ask me, the only essential oils are 'olive' and 'motor'