Replying to
@espyeen I have similar thoughts and feelings cause of my traumatic childhood and havent thought about this could also be a trans issue, thanks for the hint and words. It just feels like I cant make up for the missing time and experiences „everyone“ else had but also cant just do it now, cause thats impossible, feel I never had the experience of grewing up and therefor cant really be a functional adult who knows what they want and who they are