Rev. Onan Canobite, SubGenius
Church of the SubGenius, Member
An ugly dog of Knoxville greets you.
Harry Flashman in the news.
Dog whistle: subtle specialized signal to convey meaning to a select audience among non-select listeners.
Fog whistle: The loud siren used in fogs that isn't subtle at all, everybody hears it at once and knows what it is, but kind of pretends to be hidden.
When you get a new sketchpad, write "RUINED" on the first page and throw that page away.
There, the sketchpad has already been "ruined," you don't have to treat it as precious and brimming with perfect potential. You can, instead, actually sketch in it.
"SomaFM supports commercial, independent, emerging, and unsigned artists, and we want to help great music get heard."
The Satanic Panic condemned men and women to thousands of years in prison. Before their cases were overturned, these men and women served hundreds of years. Two died in prison, one is still in prison. Tens of millions of dollars in court costs were expended.
Then, it just wasn't talked about any more. A moral panic is defined in part by how little accountability is exacted after.
Prepare yourself to see today's moral entrepreneurs get away with it when today's moral panic is spent.
The other day I heard someone talk about "being happy" as if it were a duty. Gosh, are you unhappy and you're supposed to be happy?
Well, sunshine, have I got some news for you! Anything you're "supposed" to be doing, you're already doing. Duties like "be subject to gravity" & "be alive now and on your way to death," you've got those responsibilities covered, good job!
EVERYTHING else is your option. Like being virtuous, or JOINING...
Church of the SubGenius
Yes, Pinks hate the SubGenius, just as the SubGenius hate the Pinks.
Thing is, we're BETTER at hating than they are. They're better at a lot of things, like being-more-than-us, okay. But we're better at hating them. And each other! And ourselves! ESPECIALLY YOU. You're REAL good at it!
I don't think a lot about what will happen when I die. I do think A LOT about what might happen when select OTHER people die.
Some people report the citizens of https://dobbs.town to Your Mayor! Sometimes outsiders, sometimes fellow citizens!
Reports without a call to action may be considered for information purposes only.
"Remove this post" is a call to action. "That SubGenius is a jerk" may be true but is not a call to action.
Vincent Price Reads "Chu-Bu and Sheemish" by Lord Dunsany.
Story from 1912, recording from 1982.
"I wanna [do a thing] but does anybody care?"
See, that makes me know you don't really want to do a thing, you want people to care that you did a thing. People that aren't you. You think you don't count as a people. AND MAYBE YOU DON'T.
But... you might consider just doing a thing even if everybody hates it (possible) or if people in general never know (most likely).
When you are in an audience looking at a performer, and you see someone filming, you look at their screen and not the performer.
When you see a screen in a film or on TV, you look at the screen on the screen.
There's something deep in the mortal mind that is drawn to faces made of dots.
Job mills (mortal and software) have devalued the resume so profoundly that it is no longer a functional part of the job process (and don't even think about the online dating mills, it's too much). Soon there will only be one factor that leads to employment, who you know.
NOW is the time to JOIN...
The Church of the SubGenius
"You clash with the character of one person or another... it has to be that way. You are not a dollar bill to be liked by everyone."
Josemaría Escrivá, "The Way."
Whew - that group that told a set of gigantic lies and got caught out and lost their reputation, they're doomed!
Unlike all the other groups that told a set of gigantic lies and got caught out and kept their reputation, they're fine.
It's almost like it's not the getting caught out, and it's not the lies, it's Good Guys vs. Bad Guys.
Ensure you're on the side that decides who are the Good Guys and the Bad Guys when you JOIN...
The Church of the SubGenius
Duchamp, Mcluhan, and Warhol flattened information to render the twentieth century ready for The Salesman.
Be something to sneeze at. Be you the sneeze. Be the God Bless You. Be what you please.
Allies? ALL LIES!
The Church of the SubGenius DECLARES WAR on all that is not itself, and much of what IS itself! Eternal struggle not for the "betterment" of those who remain, but because FIGHTING IS FUN.
"Oh, sure comedy comes from suffering, but don't go too far." How far is too far? WE'LL DECIDE and then CHANGE OUR MINDS.
"Religions, of course."
Time Zone - World Destruction (1984)
κόσμον τόνδε, τὸν αὐτὸν ἁπάντων, οὔτε τις θεῶν οὐτε ἀνθρώπων ἐποίησεν, ἀλλ' ἦν ἀεὶ καὶ ἔστιν καὶ ἔσται πῦρ ἀείζωον, ἁπτόμενον μέτρα καὶ ἀποσβεννύμενον μέτρα .
♾️
Your higher form and the higher form of all things was detailed by Plato long ago. This is your better nature, the real you, and it definitely includes the you that is better at your vices as well as the you that is better at your virtues.
The Church of the SubGenius is the main source for information on the lower forms. Not (just) the dumber forms, but the simple-and-happy forms. The Bizarro you. We call this your Proto.
The chain goes up and down much further.
The Vandals - Complain (1988)
When you remember, instead of recognize, the songs you hear when you are shopping, that means you have old.
👴 👵
Be the casual casuist.
"Intelligent design" isn't objectionable because of its supernatural component. Those gods, good and bad, can defend themselves. "Intelligent design" is objectionable because of the implication that "intelligence" is a big deal, something wonderful that we're all glad about and which is linked to the morally good.
ANSWER NO.
"Quirks of Human Anatomy" by Lewis I. Held, Jr. (Cambridge University).
https://www.sdbonline.org/sites/fly/lewheldquirk/figlegq6.htm
"If I have seen further it is by standing on my own shoulders." - J. R. "Bob" Dobbs
Take a popular football videogame, make one team as weak as possible, make the other team strong as possible, play the game, edit in "Dead Flag Blues" by Godspeed You Black Emperor, and you get "Breaking Madden."
MISSION CRITICAL!
SLACKFEST 2026 update!
July 1st through July 6th "2026"
756 W 375 N, Greenfield, IN 46140
https://www.patreon.com/posts/155808802
Questions? Ask @Ferg@dobbs.town !!!
Having a plan is nearly unrelated to success. Not having a plan is pretty well related to not having success.
Your plan needs to be to JOIN...
The Church of the SubGenius
If it only hurt people I hate, pain would be awesome!
Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band - Mr Apollo (1968)
So many times I've heard that life's limitations are mortal-created, and that as a mortal you can break through them and make a big difference in the world.
So few times I've heard that life's limitations are mortal-created, and that as a mortal you can IGNORE THE WORLD AND CONCENTRATE ON J. R. "BOB" DOBBS.
HEY - Prędko, prędzej (2016)
𝐅𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐆𝐮𝐲 𝐒𝐮𝐛𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐁𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐒𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫!
Put this durable vinyl sticker on that one special container, you know the one. Two inches vertical AND horizontal due to the miracle power of circles. Just the sticker, YOU pick the container. Limited to an edition of fifty! Within the USA, $9.00, outside the USA, $12.00. Limit fifty per customer if you act now.
Aron Fromm - Norm (2026)
Baila Nova - The Man Who Sold The World (2022)
Phoxii - Incarnata (2019)
Fukkireta - Eagle Dance (2010?)
Marty Robbins - Devil Woman (1969)
The Bee Gees - Idea (1968)
