Condor Puma Serpiente

Oy don't want naur scrubs, scrub is a bloke that can't won't git fuckin shit from me

Introducing Maker’s Blart whiskey by Kevin James

Ugh gross I just spent a bunch of time reading a book when I could have been using AI. Party foul

Then the trucker's hitch, the tumble hitch (or highwaysman's hitch. I use both), the constrictor knot, and the Alpine butterfly

I love IoT. How did I live before there were cyberattack vectors in refrigerators, doorbells, and thermostats?

Important context: I am scared of heights like wowzers. You get me on a step ladder and I'm crying and shitting myself

When you saw one set of tracks, that is when Pewdiepie carried you and then called you a slur

Western farming techniques are a form of strip mining.

@rk@mastodon.well.com 😱

Youtuber uses the phrase "Begs the question" correctly challenge level remains impossible

Hold on the plunge, five-one. We're dry on sugar. Repeat, dry on white sugar. five-five has stale brown sugar in route. Standing by on pour

Beans are in-grind, four-two. Water is 10 clicks south of 100C, stand by

Uh oh, I'm finding out that Watchtower may be an unreliable narrator in the story of my docker deployment

God damn, Vikunja is the best self-hosted to-do list. This shit has everything

It's important to remember that one of the things that gets shipped around entirely via diesel-fueled trucks is gasoline

We're going to get GTA 6 before we get audio normalization as a standard quality of life feature on streaming services, so there's that

I'm glad that my expensive tools are expensive because they're good tools. I beat the living motherfuck out of them all day every day lol

Inside you are two wolves whose votes cancel each other out. It is impossible to move any legislation past the two wolves which is breaking down the entire civic system

You can buy a 12-foot roll of the same thing pimple patches are made out of for like $9

Is that good? Is that a good sign? Also, a youtube video taught me that I'm, according to the government definitions, "low" to "very low food security" lol

old man yells at cloud

@mehdirhasan@mastox.eu Of all the vile streamers she could have chosen...

We have a brew repeat repeat we have full hot brown, mission was a success. Get back home to your wife, five-one

Bill Maher, everyone: https://old.reddit.com/r/Fauxmoi/comments/1vj4klh/bill_mahers_jokes_about_ariana_grandes_weight/

Does it mean something when a shoelace breaks? Because I've had the same laces on my boots for over a year and, today, the left lace snapped. Then, about an hour later, the right lace snapped. What does this mean. Help.

I'm very food insecure about my weight

I think a cool thing to say to people would be "You out here taking L's or rolling them?" but I don't know if L joints are common enough

V2UgY2FuIGZpbmQgb3V0IGZvciBzdXJlIGlmIE1pdGNoIE1jQ29ubmVsIGlzIGhvbWUgYnkgc2V0dGluZyBmaXJlIHRvIGhpcyBob3VzZQ==

They call him "Thrivin' Ivan" because he's doing great and his name is Ivan

I feel no fallen comrades or monumental ancestors looking down upon me or urging me forward.

I rarely suffer the deluded or incurious

They say that I'm the malformed malefactor turning bricks in the wall into candles in the wind

Do you practice with your tourniquet to make sure that you can get it and use it quickly?

Roger that, over and out four-two

Alexa, what' the most plausibly deniable way to set a tripwire

A website that tells you if your information has been used in a data breach that resulted in a shakeup in the online chess world: HaveIBeenPawned

A friend and I were talking about grilling with our families because we haven't seen each other in a while and we were both simultaneously like "If we still have access to meat by then" and then we started joking(?) about having to trap squirrels for protein

Standing by. Creamer is in the wind from a grocery order, five-one. disengaging french press

I wish people could be crazysexycooler to each other

Insanity of lactation

Copy four-two. Package designation Hot Jug coming in on your 7, deploying grinds in t-5

My thing is that I don't need to cuss in my rap to sell records

So many people appear to believe that Schrodinger actually thought the cat was both alive and dead 🤦🏻‍♂️

You’ve got to be a real piece of shit to design a device that needs a -27v power supply

One of my passions is removing branding and logos from clothing and tools.

My early work was a big influence on Nikola Tesla