MeatPilot

Want to go for a walk? Who wants WALKIES!! “I Do Not Want This”

And easy to clean too!

When you need more than Sleepytime.

Small exposure?! What a whimp. Bro I’m virus maxxing. I get blood infusions from my sick homies and than let them throw up in my mouth. I’m so sick now bro, you can’t handle this. Im going to be immune to everything, viruses can’t infect dead organs.

That is better! At the time of posting I was trying to avoid the inference I wanted to fuck my cat. So I went another route.

Do you pull the Ectra beads out fast or slow?

It’s also great for stuffing a turkey.

Omg! It's Bernie Sanders with a STEEL CHAIR!

People are already making merch. At least I'd know Bigfoot would be pro-conservation.

My ma (Boomer) likes to talk about how her and her siblings used to chew on road tar like gum and than she laughs about it, har har. Whenever I mention something I'm being cautious about with my kids. She also had lung and breast cancer, could be unrelated but maybe it didn't help. I'd like to add that neither of my parents believed that second hand smoke was "real" either. So I got blasted with carcinogens from birth until I moved out at 17. I'll be lucky if I don't get cancer.

Yes exactly! That's why I go offline to go bird watching as a hobby! Occasionally, as a treat, I'll peep in on naked adults with their curtains open.

Than I realize my wife is going to start producing breast milk.

I got yah, just send me $1,000 in bitcoin if it was worth the fap.

Trying to figure out what this was from originally because it seems familiar. Was thinking it was "_Eye in the Sky_" by Philip K. Dick, but guess not?

Wheek wheek wheeeeeek!

I nearly pulled my arm out of the socket when I was in my late 30's hurt so damn bad that I didn't want to bend it certain ways. Stayed like that for about 2 months until I saw my doctor and he told me I was babying it too much and I should do certain exercises. Hurt like a motherfucker to do the exercises each time. After about 1-week it was immensely better, exercising it every morning than at night. After about a month I forgot it hurt unless I stretched it back really far to put on a jacket or reach behind me. Worked on that for about 4 months and finally it stopped hurting altogether. Moral of the story, something's just break. But typically if it's meat you got to work on it. My folks never did exercises their doctor told them to do after hip surgery or other trauma. Eventually they got so weak they could barely stand because they'd just lay in bed for days to "heal". That will bite you in ass much harder if you don't move. Keep pushing yourself, it takes a long time but it will get better, not worse.

I'm uncircumcised and my son is uncircumcised. Really goes a long way on understanding how to deal with a normal uncircumcised penis. Cleaning it doesn't take any extra effort. Unfortunately for you the information on how to care for a normal uncircumcised penis on a younger child is not easily available because of the expectation that all American children are circumcised. You are not supposed to retract the foreskin until later in life. When? Well it's different for everyone but can be as late as age 10 or more. Until that time it's "self-cleaning" just wash the outside. Tell the kid to keep trying to gently retract it when he pees or baths, if it doesn't pull back easily it's not ready. You don't need to get soap up in there until it starts retracting on it own, the skin begins to naturally separate. If you force it, you can cause scaring and damage, you're literally ripping the skin from the glans. Once it retracts, pull the foreskin back wash the glans and ta dah.. clean dick. It's made out to be this big inconvenience and believed by men with their foreskin removed. It's not at all an inconvenience. You also don't have any idea what your missing out on by having a circumcised penis. Anyway thought I'd share before you mess up your kids dick. Lot of doctors I've talked to I had to correct on the proper way to take care of an uncircumcised child's penis, it's very unsettling and you might have got incorrect information yourself. Lucky for me a have the proper equipment to know what I was talking about.

Before

I feel a lot different since I have kids across the street that would probably see me. I can't be lazy or I might get indecent exposure to minors and put on a list.

Diabetes

It's in our DNA

Wheek, wheek wheek. Wheek wheek?

Bigfoot would like to address your concerns. First, let’s clear the air. Yes, Bigfoot met with Hillary Clinton, once. The purpose was simple. To discuss whether America was ready for a cryptid in the Oval Office. In 2016, the conclusion was clear. America was not ready. A lot has changed since then. In the years that followed, I met with representatives from the Democratic National Committee, and together we agreed that my policies, and frankly, my image, would be better received in a post-Trump democracy. The country has grown. The Overton window has shifted. The vibes are different. On policy, a Bigfoot administration would deliver federally legal marijuana and common-sense abortion laws that prioritize human women while respecting reality, natural science, and personal freedom. Now, about my citizenship. There seems to be some confusion due to the fact that my listed residence is a redwood tree in Northern California. Let me be very clear: I was born here. I am a natural-born American. Multiple woodland creatures are prepared to testify under oath, including my beautiful deer wife. My strongest policies will be concerning immigration and recent ICE misconduct. Under my administration, ICE and DHS would be rebuilt from the ground up with clear accountability and policies that would never allow the abuses we see today. Bigfoot has learned to coexist with humanity and I will take what I learned into action. After all, my best friend, Chupacabra, immigrated here from Mexico. He’s a living example of how immigrants strengthen our economy and communities. He went from scuttling among rocks and occasionally siphoning goat blood to becoming a successful American entrepreneur in real estate and investment. That’s the American Dream! Let me be clear! Bigfoot will stomp out corruption in 2028.

I'll actually apologize for doing this. It's apparently the latest TikTok trend. My wife mentioned it and I thought there needed to be an image because I couldn't find one. Also the song was horribly insensitive to Native Americans, so he deserves becoming a joke.

Now I need to find out how deep this tar chewing goes...

Done 👍

Massive flooding to follow.

Think my math was incorrect. 1/3 hotdog, 1/3 parakeet, 1/3 Timothy

Yeah I've had a prominent widows peak since my hair grew in. Lot of comments about how I looked like Dracula or Eddie Munster. Got bad enough I tried shaving it in highschool, which honestly looked way way worse. Morale of the story, men can have different hairlines that are not straight across. Just own it.

It’s kind of like “To Catch a Predator” because their is justice. Unfortunately the executives you’d pitch this to are also the targets of the show. But I guess they greenlight “To Catch a Predator” and were child predators.

Finally a gameshow I’d be good at! Unfortunately my whole family is dead, so they couldn’t watch it.

I’m older and my blood circulation is shit because of the medications I’m on. Also I sweat horribly like all the men in my family. I’m fucked.

Washing yourself is healthy, overdoing anything is unhealthy. Yes you will kill good bacteria, but you also kill bad (streptococcus for example). I use sensitive non antibacterial soap daily and mix in antibacterial wash a few times a week. Mainly for my armpits, ass, face, and junk. Maintain a balance, but please wash your ass.

He gets to keep 25% of the bugs he catches. You get to eat the other 75%. Any changes to the web will void his deposit and you get to eat 500 of his bugs to repair any damage. Utilities are not included. There will be a 5 bug charge for each droplet of water he drinks from the faucet. Even though he lives near WiFi, there is a hookup fee and monthly cost of 25 bugs. Implement those and you’ll eat like a king!

Trying to focus on my second screen with mature gay porn playing on it instead.

Mental health issues suck because you’re better off not telling people what you have. Very close friends, some family, and your medical professionals are fine, but everyone else is just a risk not worth taking. If you had some physical alignment people are more accepting and compassionate. If you have schizophrenia, people will fear you. If you’re bipolar, people will question and misjudge your actions. If you have anxiety disorder, people will think your overreacting. If you have clinical depression, people will tell you to just get over it.